A Child's First Christmas in Dixie

This is my darling daughter's first Christmas. She won't remember anything about it. Not one note of "White Christmas" or one twinkle of the tree lights. She doesn't care if I will have to unwrap for her the packages I just wrapped last week. She'll never be able to tell me from memory what she got, what she wore or who she saw. So why on earth am I bothering to make such a fuss?

Because we waited for this angel to land for over 4 years, and finally, FINALLY, I get to experience Christmas from the perspective of a mother. I hear her laugh as I sing the songs to her. I get to see those lights twinkling in her eyes. I'll watch her grip the wrapping paper and try to put it in her mouth, probably ignoring the toys themselves. I'll relish the "oohs" and "aahs" of friends and family who meet her for the first time, and delight in their comments of how adorable she is in her cute Christmas outfit.

That's why I bother to make such a fuss. Because I'm her mother, and I'm having a blast!

Hooked Up

Finally, our PC is back in the house, and our laptop is on our wireless network. That means we can both be on a computer at the same time. Hallelujah, no more "I want a turn!" So here I sit, watching Nanny 911 while blogging. Life is truly wonderful. ;)

Way Back When

I remember way back when...

• I could make a quick trip to the store without packing enough gear for an ascent of Mt. Everest.
• getting out of the car to go into the store didn't involve a moderate amount of weight-lifting. (Those car seats get heavy!)
• I didn't make up silly little nicknames for people, like "Punkadoodle".
• getting a shower wasn't a masterful feat of timing.
• the words "time for a change" referred to my hair color.
• the only pink in my house was lemonade.

And you know what? I don't really miss those days at all!

A Southern Christmas

This far south, the idea of a white Christmas is almost as ridiculous as a natural tan in Minnesota in January. But I've learned to adjust. Mostly.

I miss snow. Mind you, we didn't get much of it even in my section of Pennsylvania, but at least we got a smattering each year. You could count on that, at least. But it's going to be almost 70 degrees here tomorrow. I think I'd do really well designing a series of Christmas warm-weather clothes. You know, bikinis with wreaths on the top, Santa swim trunks, etc. I think it would be a big hit. Here, at least. Definitely in Miami.

At least my Christmas tree isn't a Palm. How would THAT be for confusing Christmas and Easter?!

Straight out of America's Funniest Videos

You know the one. The one where some silly daddy is doing something goofy with his infant child like holding it over his head. Then, without warning, the baby chooses that moment to reintroduce the contents of his/her stomach. Well, let me tell you. It's even funnier in person - at least, when it happens to someone else.

Love/Hate

Things I Love:

• Fall
• The smell of woodsmoke
• Leftover turkey (I can't wait for this!)
• Chocolate
• The smell of my baby after a bath
• A smile from my baby
• My husband, especially with my baby
• "The Soup" (a family recipe - yummy!)
• The anticipation of Christmas
• People who read my blog and comment :)
• Jesus

Things I Hate:

• Cleaning
• The smell of used cat litter
• Heat and humidity
• The sound of my baby doing that high-pitched crying
• Not living in my own home
• My weakness for chocolate
• My husband's having to work late
• My computer - for crashing and leaving us without our data

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Yes, it's fall, my favorite season, and it's getting colder, which means a LOT here in Mississippi. And it's getting closer to Thanksgiving, which means it's getting closer to Christmas. YAY! (By the way, if you're in retail and reading this, PLEASE someone tell me why you put out the Christmas stuff before Halloween is even over. Did you forget there's a holiday in between the two?

This is gonna be a great Christmas, since we now have a child with whom to enjoy it. I know she's way too young to have a clue, but it's still fun getting ready for her First Noel. I think she'll at least get a kick out of the lights. :)

Glorious Sleep!

Our darling daughter has been sleeping through the night (at least 6 hours) in her crib in her own room for 4 nights in a row. I think we're getting the hang of this!

My fellow parents, if this makes you mad or jealous, sorry! I'm just so happy and no longer sleep deprived. And yes, I know we may have some lapses during teeting, growth spurts, etc. I'm just so glad to know it's possible!

Dang-Blang Computer Crashes!

Our PC crashed. Not good. Our bookkeeping files, my work stuff, our ongoing letters to Jadyn, and all the photos of her first 2 months are on that computer. I hope and pray that our dear friend Morgan can salvage at least those bits of 0s and 1s.

As much as technology helps us, it sure does cause problems too!!!

Falling In Love, All Over Again

It started in the hospital. I, recovering from a c-section, was strapped to the bed with all sorts of tubes and needles, feeling the effects of the trippy IV pain relief. My brand new daughter was wriggling and fussy and obviously needed a diaper change. My darling husband stepped up to the plate, and having never attempted such a feat before, off came the old diaper and on went the new. No instruction needed, apparently, as he did just fine.

And that was just the start.

Seeing Paul interact with Jadyn makes me love him in a whole new way. He's so fun to watch as he talks to her, makes faces at her, kisses her, and declares over and over how much he wishes someone would pay him just to hang out with her. It does a mother's heart good to know that her husband, the father of her pride and joy, feels the very same way.

And he's great at those 3 AM diaper changes, too.

Inner Child

I saw this on Jackie's blog and decided to try it. Should I be worried? Seek counseling, maybe?

Your Inner Child Is Angry

You're not an angry person. But when you don't get your way, watch out. Like a very manipulative kid, you will get what you want. Even if it takes a little kicking and screaming.

How Is Your Inner Child?

Grrrrrr!

If my dog doesn't stop chewing up pacifiers, he will remain in the dog box permanently!

Ok, rant over.

Hidden Message?

I got this from my friend Jackie's blog and thought I'd try it.

The Blog Archives and Hidden Meanings meme.

The criteria: Delve into your blog archive. Find your 23rd post (or closest to). Find the fifth sentence (or closest to). Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions. Ponder it for meaning, subtext or hidden agendas.

Okay, I went back and found my 23rd post and the fifth sentence in that post. Here is what I said at that time…

So I guess I just look around and make lists.

I wonder if this means I am a planner, but not a person of action. I observe and make notes but don't do anything about my observations. Any thoughts?

Baby Talk

To my all my friends:

I really am trying to find other things to talk about besides my baby. Honest. Please inform me of other possible topics of conversation, and I promise I'll try to talk about them without somehow involving Jadyn. Yes, I know that is unlikely, as I have the ability to somehow involve her in a conversation about such random topics as the Supreme Court nomination and the bombings in India. But I'm working on it. Honest.

Have I mentioned how cute she is? How I hope she's one day smart enough to be on the bench of the Supreme Court? How I sincerely hope she's never involved in a terrorist bombing?

See, I did it again!

Sobering News

Hearing news of death is never easy. It's a serious subject that is bound to darken the mood of just about anyone. But when death takes someone unexpectedly, it's even worse. I mourn the passing of my friend Rina. We met in college and I believe I was the one who introduced her to her husband Dave. She had 3 children under the age of 5, the youngest only 4 months. She collapsed suddenly from an undiagnosed heart problem that we now know was somehow related to her post-partum status. 5 days later, after being in a coma since her collapse, she moved to Heaven. She was a jewel of a person - calling to check on me several times during my pregnancy and after Jadyn was born. She was warm, caring, fun and friendly, and she will be missed.

Times like these make me think about the actual brevity of life. As the Bible says, it really is like a breath, then it's gone. Sometimes those breaths are too short. I am reminded to count each day as precious, and to take nothing for granted.

God, please hug Rina for me, and tell her I miss her.

How would I type out that sound?

You know, that sound you make when you run your finger back and forth over your lips while humming? The one you make when you indicate that you're feeling a little out of touch with reality? Well, that's pretty much the sounds I'd be making if I had the energy to do so.

Baby Growth Spurt = Scant Sleep for Mommy.

Feeling Protective

Don't you hate it when you're not in a position to stand up for your loved ones when people treat them like crap?

Ok, It's Official!

I really am a mother. I mean, I know that when they pulled my baby out of the big gash they cut into my abdomen, I actually became a mother. But the "feeling" of being a mother is taking a while to kick in. I think this week it has finally happened.

First, I went to MOPS (Mothers Of PreSchoolers) for the first time this week. It's held at my church in the next town and there are lots of folks I know, but introducing myself to strangers as "mother of Jadyn" was really sort of bizarre. Don't get me wrong, I LOVED how folks ooohed and aaahed over her, remarking at how beautiful she is. (As if I hadn't noticed.) But relating birthing and breastfeeding stories has up until now been so very foreign to me. During the 4 1/2 years we TRIED to get pregnant, I was relegated to such conversation topics simply because almost all my friends had kids, and children were 90% of the time the subject of choice. Now I've joined the ranks, earned my childbirth and breastfeeding merit badges and been welcomed as a full participant in the club.

So my new and old friends asked about my birth experience, how breastfeeding is going, how I'm handling the transition, etc. Somewhere in the middle of it all, I began to grasp how very real this all is. I'm not just babysitting on a long-term basis. No one is coming to pick Jadyn up and thank me for watching her. This is it - I'm her Mommy!

Then today, because it was a lovely sunny day with a mild temperature, Jadyn and I went to the local park. No special reason, except for the feeling I was getting that if I sat on that couch in front of that TV one more minute I would become zombified beyond recognition. So on to the park we went. There were 2 other mommies there at the playground with their kids, so I chose a bench on the other side, parked Jadyn and just watched the kids play. It was lovely to just be in the sunshine for a while.

After some time one of the little girls (Rose, an adorable blond 2 year old who apparently never met a stranger) came up to me and showed me all the cool things she was finding on the ground. You know, the usual treasures: part of a broken pen, a leaf, a dirty string, a used pink straw, etc. Eventually her mommy came up to check out what she was doing, and we struck up a conversation. She invited me to the local MOPS group that meets in this town, which is great because 1) it meets about 10 minutes away whereas the other group is 25 minutes away, 2) it's made up of local people so I'll get to make new friends who actually live close by, and 3) it meets on opposite weeks as the other group so I'll be able to go to both.

Anyway, I met Janet and her friend Beth at the park, and there we were, the 3 of us MOMMIES, talking about our kids and the joys and trials of motherhood. Again it hit me. Oh my gosh, this is my new life! I've become one of them! And you know what? Now I am beginning to understand why most of my mommy friends never talked about much besides their kids. Who has time for anything else?

Anyway, that was my profound experience of the week.

Someone Should Warn Her

It struck me today, as I held my beautiful daughter in my arms, that she has what seems to be an unwavering trust in me. It's like she knows that I will do anything and everything in my power to ensure her safety and health. As she drifted off to sleep, letting her body go limp against mine, the reality of her unconscious faith in my love for her stunned me. Doesn't she know I have no idea what I'm doing? That fear of making mistakes threatens to paralyze me into non-action? That her confidence in my parental abilities may very well be misplaced?

Actually, as long as I change her bottom when it's wet or dirty and stick my boob in her face every few hours, she's pretty happy. I guess at this point, that's all she needs to know.

No, it's not PPD!

I swear, there is something about my OB's office that makes me cry. The past 3 times I've gone in there, I've burst into tears for no real reason. Thankfully my doctor doesn't think it's post-partum depression, but just normal hormones. It's so odd. I wonder if it's because I had such a good experience with my doctor and I don't like the thought of not seeing him every week or two anymore. Is that odd or what?

Another Candle on His Cake

Happy Birthday to my darling husband PAUL!!!!!

38 years ago my sweet honey was born, and the world became a a better place.

Have a great one, Mr. Bear!!!

Oh, NOW I Get It!

When I was a kid, I was amazed at how it seemed that my mom never sat down. Except for her morning Bible reading, she was always up doing something. It became a joke in our house that my mom never saw an entire movie we rented because she was always leaving the room to take care of something.

Now I've only been a mom for a little over 3 weeks, but already I'm beginning to understand. I have to catch my moments of productivity in bits and pieces when they pop up. A quick load of laundry during nap time, hurredly unloading the dishwasher while Paul does a diaper change, a fast swish of toilet cleaning after a 10-second potty break. This, apparently, is the life of a mother. It's beautiful, magical, draining, and requiring the utmost in organization and discipline. And I'm loving it.

Thanks, Mom, for all those times you missed the movie.

Getting Bigger

Thankfully Jadyn has surpassed her birth weight - she is now 7 pounds even and we don't have to go back to the doctor till her 2 month check-up. Hallelujah! Thanks for praying, and keep it up! This nursing thing is getting easier but we're not out of the woods yet!

On The Upswing

Well, Jadyn is getting better. She gained 3 ounces since Monday which the doctor said is good. I've had to supplement some and I'm pumping to up my output. We'll see how it goes.

Failure To Thrive

It's amazing how 3 words can either send your heart soaring to the clouds or plunging into an abyss. Let me explain:

At Jadyn's 2-week check-up yesterday, it was discovered that she has actually lost weight. I thought I'd been feeding her often enough and long enough, but apparently that's not the case. My heart broke when I saw the "diagnosis" on the sheet I was given: Failure To Thrive. When I saw this, I felt like it really meant "Bad Mother". I have been instructed to feed her every 2 hours for at least 30 minutes total. Yes, that means I will become an upright milk cow. Thankfully, during the night it will be every 4 hours, so I can catch a hint of sleep. On Friday we'll go back and see how she's doing. Please pray she picks up weight, because I am really stressed out by this.

Shouldn't They Have Checked Us Out First?

The other day Paul made a really interesting comment to my parents. He said something like, "You know, if you want to adopt a child, there are all these tests and checks that you have to go through to confirm that you'll be a fit parent. But if you have a baby of your own, they just let you walk out of the hospital with her!"

I had to think about that. You know, it really is crazy. How come the physical ability to bear a child negates the need to check for fit parenthood? Just cause my "plumbing" functioned, that doesn't mean I'll be the kind of mother I should. Shouldn't they have stopped us at the door of the hospital and checked our mental and emotional stability BEFORE the checked to see if we had a proper car seat?

I have friends who have adopted, either domestically or internationally, and it is amazing how much paperwork they had to go through just to be approved for consideration. We even went down that road ourselves for a little while, and it was amazing how much there was to do. But then we got pregnant, and no one asked us to do a home study or fill out a survey about our relationship or anything. No one checked to make sure I was eating properly or taking my vitamins or keeping my doctor appointments. They didn't call to confirm that we'd gone through childbirth classes or read up on all the latest parenting wisdom. Then she was born, and after just a few days in the hospital, they said, "Yep, she looks good, here ya go!" And off we went. Oh my gosh, how did they know we aren't stark raving lunatics? (I mean, ALL the time.)

To all my friends who've adopted, kudos to you for going through the red tape to become parents. I have no idea why there's this strange assumption that working biology equals the right to be a parent, but if you've had to run the bureaucratic gauntlet to bring home your own child, hats off to you!

Hooray for Post-Partum Weight Loss!

Today at my doctor appointment I was actually excited to get on the scales. I have heard the legendary tails of post-partum weight loss, especially in "women of size", and I definitely count myself as one of those. To my delight, I stepped on the scale, having set the "big number" setting where it normally goes, and CLUNK went the scale. I had to back it up!!! As it turns out, I am down 33 pounds from my delivery weight and 29 pounds from my pre-pregnancy weight. Then there's the likelihood that I'll lose more as I nurse. WOO-HOO! If anyone had told me that getting pregnant would be this good a diet, I'd have never believed them. Imagine the reaction of folks who haven't seen me in a while and ask what I did to lose the weight, and I just say, "I had a baby!" Typically the scale goes in the other direction, doesn't it??

Internet Baby

See, doesn't it just figure that a woman who met her hubby online would also do a blog for her newborn daughter? Welcome to the true technological age. Anyway, please take a moment to stop by Jadyn's Journey and see the journey unfold! Comments are more than welcome. And when I ask for advice, PLEASE give it, because I'm new at this and there are SO many things I haven't figured out yet.

If it weren't for my parents....

I would truly be lost. They have been a literal God-send during this time. They arrived the day before I went into the hospital, so they were able to care for our pets, get our mail and watch our home while we were away. Because we are still finishing up the move, they've been working their tails off bringing over loads of boxes that we never got around to transporting. Mom has been handling meals and shopping while Dad has done odd jobs at our house and our rental home. I must remember to keep this in mind: no matter how ridiculous I think my childhood was with regard to some issues, I will never be able to repay my parents for all they have done for us just in the past week.

Details, details

I forgot to mention the stuff everyone tends to ask: Jadyn was 6 lb 14 oz and 20 inches long. All fingers, toes, bits and pieces accounted for.

Oh yeah, and sleep? Well, I already forget what 8 hours in a row feels like.

1+1=3

Well, our little duo has become a threesome. Jadyn Liana was born Saturday, 9/10/05 at 8:17 AM.

You know, I type that sentence with such ease, but truthfully, it was NOT an easy process. My water broke Friday night, so off to the hospital we went (after my dear hubby finished an hour's worth of work). Upon arrival, when my doctor found I was not contracting on my own, he hooked me up to pitocin, the devil's drug. On and on the contractions came, but no dilation. So after he kept upping the dosage, I got some stadol to help deal with the pain. Still no dilation. Up went the pitocin. I gave up and got the epidural, which wasn't as bad as I thought. The worst part was having to stay still during the contractions so he could put the thing in. I was literally shaking from the pain. That was around 2:30 AM, and I was only dilated 2 cm. Around 4:30 I had dilated no further, and we decided that it looked like a c-section. The baby was pretty much stuck on some little bones in my pelvis. We made the final decision about 6 AM and at 8 AM I was wheeled into the operating room. She was born and pretty much wisked away for her check-up. Thankfully I got to catch a fleeting glimpse of her and hear the pediatrician say she looked good (over the sounds of her crying).

Anyway, I'm recovering from a delivery that pretty much went completely the opposite of everything I wanted, but in the end, I still have a beautiful baby. Now I see how utterly ridiculous it was of me to bother with a birth plan. Next time, my birth plan will be one word only: c-section.

Oh, here's a picture of my angel child:

Ticking Timebomb

Now that my parents are here and have helped us with the unpacking, I'm beginning to feel like a ticking timebomb, with folks just waiting for me to go off. Every time I wince in pain, everyone jumps, even though it's from a sore hip or something non-uterus related. I keep getting phone calls along the lines of "You're not at the hospital?" to which I want to respond, "I'm talking to you, aren't I? You called me at home, didn't you?" I'm telling ya, I really hope this happens sooner rather than later now. You know what they say about a watched pot never boiling? I wonder if that's true of a pregnant woman too.

Much Relief

Ahhhh. I have a lot to relax about. First, Mom and Dad will be coming down tomorrow - it was originally thought they wouldn't be able to because of the gas crunch, but things are getting better so they are on their way. The good thing about this is that they can help me unpack and will be here to take care of the pets while we're in the hospital.

Then there's the sheer miracle that we got all our furniture in our house. The movers came today, and while there were a few things that were damaged, all in all, it's not too bad. I keep reminding myself that at least I'm not stuck in the Astrodome with no hope of finding a home any time soon. Things could truly be FAR worse.

And finally, I think that I'm pretty much ready to have this baby. I mean, I'm sure there are thousands of ways I'm NOT ready, but for all practical purposes, I have everything done that really NEEDS to be done before she gets here.

It really is all going to be ok.

The "Wonder" of It All

As motherhood approaches more quickly than I care to accept, I find myself wondering many things, in no particular order. I wonder....

• if I'm going to go into labor any second now.
• if I'll be able to get through labor and delivery without swearing like a sailor.
• if I am going to rip stem to stern and need to sit on a pillow for the next month.
• how my sweet hubby Paul is going to handle seeing me in the throes of labor.
• if my parents will arrive (yes, thank God, they're coming on Thursday) in time.
• how my sweet pets (3 cats & a dog) are going to handle the big homecoming.
• what on earth this baby will look like.
• how much she is going to weigh, and exactly what is that going to do to me.
• if I'm ever going to sleep again.
• how I'll emotionally respond to someone being so completely dependent on me for EVERYTHING.
• what kinds of grandparents my parents are going to be.
• if this baby is going to like me.
• what kind of personality she'll have.
• how on earth I'll deal with working after having a baby - even though I'm blessed to work only part-time and mostly from home.
• if I'll be able to breastfeed.
• if I have all the gear I'm really going to need to make this work.
• if I have the emotional maturity and stability I'm going to need to make this work.
• how this is going to change my relationship with Paul.
• if I'll ever want sex again.
• if I'll want any other children after going through this.
• how many diapers I'll go through in a day, and if I have enough in stock for the first month or two.
• if this is going to change my relationship with my friends.
• if ANYTHING is ever going to seem the same.
• if I'm going to be even the least little bit sorry I've been praying for a baby for 4 1/2 years.

I know, pretty blatant and honest, huh? Well, if you can't be honest with your blog-reading friends, who CAN you be honest with?

One Week & Counting

Well, my due date is officially one week away. I'm beginning to be flooded with the normal questions: "Are you ready?" "I bet you can't wait, right?" "How are you feeling?" "What does the doctor say?" And my favorite: "You still haven't had that baby?" I have so far been able to swallow the instinctual smart-a$$ responses and give sweeter, more southern-acceptable answers instead. The truthful answers are:

1. No, I'm not really ready. We still have one more big phase of this move that will not happen until Wednesday. That's when the professional movers come and get all the stuff we couldn't get ourselves or with the help of friends. (By the way, a huge THANK YOU to all who have helped us during this crazy time!) In all the absolutely necessary ways I suppose I am ready, but there's lots I feel I won't get to in time. This leads me to the answer to the next question....
2. Yes, I can wait. Honestly, as the reality of motherhood approaches at what seems to be light speed, I'm scared to death of labor & delivery, and how radically this is going to change me and my life. I don't think I'd mind if this baby came a full week late.
3. I'm feeling excited, scared, thankful, anxious, awkward, happy and tense. These varying emotions run through me at a rate of about one per second. Physically I'm feeling like there's someone inside me who wants to get out. She's running out of room in there, after all, and growing by the day.
4. The doctor says (or at least said, at my last appointment) that I'm not dilated and he'll "let me go" another week. Of course, I won't even be at my due date for another week, and I am giving no indications that I'll need to be induced before then. He also says everything is fine.
5. Take a good look at me. Do I have a newborn in my arms? Is my belly still protruding rather roundly? Am I still waddling? What do YOU think?!

At least on a blog I can be sarcastic without offending the well-intentioned folks who just want to show they care and are mostly reduced to the trite questions everyone asks at this stage of pregnancy.

All Things Considered.

...things are good. I mean, we had no damage, I'm not in labor yet, and the move is progressing as well as can be expected. So what if gas is hard to find! So what if our cable will now not be installed until TUESDAY, leaving me with just 2 aerial tv stations and slow dial-up internet! At least I'm not like one woman I saw on the news, who is 9 months pregnant, having pains, and is stuck on an interstate bridge, camping out with a bunch of other refugees. Like I said, all things considered, things are good!

Weathering the Storm

Well, phase one of our move is complete and we're now staying in the new house. The professionals will come move the other furniture and stuff next week. For now, we're battening down the hatches and hoping we have no storm damage from Hurricane Katrina. It's getting worse out there. People keep saying that storms can make pregnant women go into labor, so I'm TRYING not to freak out. So far no contractions, so maybe I'll be ok.

Weather or Not

Now we have Hurricane Katrina coming closer to shore. She's now a Cat 5 and will likely still be at hurricane strength when she reaches my area. If I hear one more time how a storm can throw a pregnant person into labor, I think I will really scream. I am NOT READY! The professional movers can't come until Sep 7, and I'd really like this baby to hold off until after that. Yes, yes, I know, as HUNDREDS of people are fond of pointing out, babies like to come whenever they want, whether or not it's convenient. OK, folks, I get it!!! Can't I just have my own small delusion of control for a few minutes every now and then???

Ok, I'm better now.

Who I'm Thankful For

As much as I've been freaking out about the craziness of my life lately, I am very thankful for the following people: (not to the exclusion of anyone not listed)

- My husband. God bless him, he's trying as hard as he can to be as understanding as possible when I have my moments of freaking out.
- My daughter. I'm especially thankful that she's on her way, but doesn't seem to be in too big a hurry about it. I need all the time I can get to prepare for her.
- My friends from church. They're dropping off boxes, helping me clean the new house, helping me pack the house, and helping us move our stuff from one house to the other. Most of all, they're praying for me and encouraging me.
- My parents. They're going to come down to help make sure someone is around to guide the professional movers in case I go into labor. They'll help a lot with unpacking, too, I'm sure.
- My boss/pastor. He's being very understanding of the stress I'm under in life, and he's doing all he can to support and help us.
- God. Of course there would be no way I'd get through any of this without him.

Badge of honor

Someone said to me the other day that I'm earning quite a badge of honor by being 9 months pregnant and surviving this horrible Mississippi summer heat. It kind of makes me laugh, because it's not like I decided to do it like this. After 4 1/2 years of trying to conceive, who'd have guessed that when it finally happened, my due date would be smack at the end of a steamy southern summer? I haven't really earned anything by surviving the heat. Now, if I make it through this move while 9 months pregnant in a Mississippi summer, THAT, my friends, earns me a badge of honor.

If you've ever moved in the summer while pregnant, kudos to you! And tell me how you managed it - I could use some survival tips!

Dirty News

Why does newsprint come off so easily on the hands? I mean, we can put men on the moon and send pictures through our phones, but no one has been able to come up with clean news ink? Hasn't technology progressed to the point where you can touch newspapers without getting smudgy fingerprints? What's the deal?

One Box, Two Box, Red Box, Blue Box

I'm officially surrounded by boxes. It's good, because it shows progress. But it also indicates to me how much more packing I have to do. We're doing our best to get the house empty in the next 10 days so that it can quickly be put on the rental market. The good thing is that it will be over soon. I know I keep saying this, but I'm really hoping the baby stays put until we get established in the new place.

Well, back to work!

YUMMY!

I must say, I LOVE Swedish Fish candy! There's just something so appealing about fish-shaped gummy gelatinous sugar product with red dye #40.

I truly am a child of the 70s!

Packing while pregnant

Well, here I am, 37 weeks pregnant, and it looks like we're going to try to pull off this move BEFORE our little bundle of joy drops in. So I'm very carefully packing what I can on my own, and I'm hoping and praying for our friends will be able to pitch in.

I'm still really frustrated that we're having to do this. There are worse things in life, I know, and I'm thankful to not be going through them. I'm just sad about leaving our house which I've worked so hard to decorate. And our little girl won't get to enjoy the nursery I carefully planned for her. While I know this move will be good in the long run in lots of ways, it's still hard to deal with the emotions it stirs in me, especially now that I'm a great hormonal whale. :)

House Hunt

Today we began looking for a rental house in our soon-to-be new home town. Since it's a college town, there seems to be a lot of houses on the rental market. But because it's a college town, the quality can be questionable. The first one we saw was rather run down and had a funny smell. It was far too small and the paint job was reminiscent of a kindergartener with finger paints.

The second one we saw was much better. Bigger, no funny smell, and much more well-maintained. It's not perfect, but it would definitely be a better fit for us. We're going to keep it in mind. We still have a few more we'd like to see before we make a decision. And we can't decide how soon to take on a new place. Should we go ahead and rent something we like NOW so we have time to move in slowly? Or should we not even bother until after the baby is born? How long can we afford paying rent without having our house rented out as well?

So many questions. I really just wish it were over already.

Ok, I give.

I broke down, went and got some boxes, and started packing little things. Ahhhhh. I feel much better just having gotten a start. I know that's a little crazy, since I have 3 boxes down and probably 200 to go. But at least now I can say I started. Whew! (Ssshhhh, don't tell my doctor! He said no packing! But I'm not lifting the boxes, just filling, taping and labeling them, so that doesn't count, does it?)

Identity Crisis

I am now posting under the name YankeeAmanda. Please don't be confused. I'm still me.

The joy of gift certificates

There's nothing quite like getting a gift certificate. I got a nice one for Amazon.com from some friends as a baby shower gift. It arrived today, and I immediately spent it. There were things on my registry I have not yet received, so I went ahead and bought them for myself. Now I'll have the apparently essential nursing pillow and a diaper bag. Necessary items that I didn't have to spend my own dang money on. Woo-hoo!

Itching to pack

As I look around my house, I feel this intense urge to start packing NOW, before the baby is on the OUTSIDE and needs a lot more attention than she does now. There are lots of little things I could be packing, like candles, pictures, DVDs and other items we don't need. The doctor, hnowever, has said that I need to let it go for now. This pregnancy has gone too well for too long to mess it up now by trying to do things that don't have to be done now.

So I guess I just look around and make lists. That's about all I can do for now. Did I mention it's driving me crazy???

NO AD ZONE!

Please, people, I love it when folks post comments, but only if they aren't ads for their own money-making ventures!!! Sheesh! From this point on, comments that are not specific to the post and that simply advertise your own business will be deleted. Sorry, I'm not a commercial site!

Apparently, I've been tagged!

My friend Martha has tagged me, so here it is.

The rules say:

List five songs that you are currently digging - it doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words...or even if they're not any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now.

Post these instructions and the five songs (with artist) in your blog.

Then tag five people to see what they're listening to.

1. She Will Be Loved - Maroon 5
2. Arlington - Trace Adkins
3. Something More - Sugarland
4. Holy is the Lord - Chris Tomlin
5. Blessed Be the Name - Matt Redman

Ok, so now I have to tag 5 folks. Sorry, I hope this doesn't cause any problems. Don't participate if you choose not to. I'm tagging Jackie, Rachelle, Allison, Eve and sjsimbo. This should be interesting.

Good move, lousy timing.

Sometimes I simply cannot believe that this is my life. Not that I'm complaining, necessarily. It's just that sometimes the twists and turns are enough to make me lose my lunch.

Paul is being transferred to an office in Starkville, MS, about 30 minutes away, which is a really good thing for his career. He'll have a lot more autonomy, get away from some difficult personalities in his current office, and it will look great on his resume for future positions. But to effectively cover this new territory, we need to live there. That means we're moving. Again. We have moved 7 times in 7 years, and we only bought and moved into this house 8 months ago.

Now, I know how to move. As I've said, I've done it a lot so I'm very familiar with the experience. But I've never had a baby, then had to move WITH said baby. This is all new ground I'll be covering. I'm less than a month from my due date, and all the work I've done for the baby's room is now moot. And forget nesting - it's all going to be in boxes. Though, I'm not sure exactly how everything is going to GET into boxes, since now I'm too pregnant to pack, and afterward I may not be able to do any lifting for a while. It's a good thing we're plugged into a great church, where our loving friends will come along side us and help us get through this. I don't know how people do things like this by themselves.

We are going to try to be set up in our new town by the end of the year. Our decision is to rent out our home and then rent a place in the new town for the first year. We need to see how this transition goes before going through another real estate transaction.

I think God likes teaching me just how little control I really have in life. I thought I was going to get a good grasp on this concept with the whole birth process, but apparently that was not a big enough teaching opportunity on it's own. "Ok, God, I get it. There is absolutely nothing in life I can control except my reaction to the things you bring into it. This move was Your idea, and therefore, Your problem. Just point me in the right direction."

More "assembly required"

Today I put together our baby's travel system. Thankfully it was a LOT easier than that irritating piece of furniture from Kmart. Just pop on the wheels and a few other plastic pieces. Not hard at all, even while 9 months pregnant.

Now that we have the carseat, I think we're just about all set and ready for the baby. I have diapers & wipes, a crib, a bouncy seat, a travel system, more washcloths than I can count, and a ton of cutesy clothes. I still don't have a few things I'd like to have before the baby is born, but if she comes out early, I think I'll be able to manage.

I still can't believe I'm going to be a mommy in a month!!!!

100 Things About Me

Having been inspired by my dear friend Martha, I have decided to post my very own list of 100 things about me. Please let me know if you find something of particular interest in this gathering of opinions and mostly trivial biographical information. These are not necessarily listed in any particular order.

1. I'm officially 9 months pregnant tomorrow. And yet I have a month till my due date. Go figure.

2. I met my darling husband on the internet almost 7 1/2 years ago - back when it was not very common to do so.

3. In high school I took 4 years of French, 2 years of German and a year of Spanish. I did NOT, however, take any math higher than Algebra II.

4. My current favorite TV show is "Battlestar Galactica". This is the new version on the SciFi channel, and is about 100x better than the cheesy 70s version.

5. I have 3 cats (Max, Millie and Maggie) and a dog (Hershey). I am worried about how they'll handle having a baby in the house.

6. I've been living in the south since November 1998, but I'm a born and bred Yankee. Folks down here still don't know how to take me sometimes.

7. Watching shows like "Babies: Special Delivery" make me feel simultaneously educated and terrified. I'm aware of all the things that could happen, so I feel aware, but I'm scared that some of those things will happen to me.

8. I'm serving as the Director of Children's Ministry at my church. I took the job a week before I got pregnant. Little did I know I'd be immediately starting my own personal children's ministry so soon after accepting the position.

9. I have one brother, Jason, who is 6 years younger than me. He and I have very divergent personalities and interests.

10. My degree from Millersville University in PA is a BA in Political Science. I haven't used this degree for work since October 1998.

11. Paul (my husband) and I honeymooned in NY and New England. My two favorite memories are going to the Culinary Institute of America for lunch, and visiting the Ben & Jerry's plant in Vermont. (Interesting that they are both food-related.)

12. I have never in my life been accused of being skinny. Weight has always been an issue for me, but at 36 weeks, I am still under my pre-pregnancy weight by 8 pounds. The doctor says as long as the baby is growing, he's not concerned.

13. I love to do sign language to music at church. And from the responses I usually get, folks like to see it, too.

14. I love to paint, but I'm really not very good at it. I consider it more therapeutic than anything else.

15. I loathe cleaning. I only do it because once it's done, I feel better.

16. My favorite meal is roast beef, mashed potatoes w/gravy, green beans, sweet tea and chocolate cheesecake for dessert. YUM.

17. My husband and I have moved 7 times in less than 7 years. I can't stand the thought of another move anytime soon, but sometimes I don't get my way.

18. I have never broken a bone, but my mom didn't break a bone till she was 40, so I may get there one day too.

19. I think I accidentally threw out my high school senior year book. Oops. Oh well, I didn't get along too well with a lot of those folks anyway.

20. In high school as well as in college, the classes I did the best in were the classes taught by my favorite teachers. I figure there must be a correlation.

21. While I'm not really a big fan of antique furniture, we sure have a LOT of it. It's inherited from my husband's family.

22. I think that no matter how nervous my husband is about becoming a father, he's going to be fabulous at it. I just hope he accepts that no one does it perfectly.

23. After having read the blogs of other folks, I wish mine were wittier. I do the best I can, but I'm not nearly as funny as some others I've seen.

24. My great aunt Ethel died 2 days ago. She was 89, and I don't remember what she looked like. She lived in Arizona for most of her life.

25. I had a baby shower today, hosted by friends from church. They gave me the leftover cake - it equals a quarter-sheet. Gadzooks, that's a lot of cake.

26. I am nowhere near ready for this whole parenthood thing. But then again, is anyone, really?

27. Someday my husband and I would like to live just outside Nashville, TN. It's pretty expensive around those parts, so we'll see.

28. I've been to both US coasts, but never to a Midwestern state. I'd like to go to Texas someday, hopefully when it's not too hot.

29. I'm more addicted to TV than I would dare admit to most of my friends. I intend to work on this after the baby is born.

30. I haven't had any good Greek food in years, and I'd really like to have some. But sadly, there are no Greek restaurants where I live.

31. In college, I was very active in InterVarsity Christian Fellowship and served as the worship leader for several years. I miss those folks a lot and I wish someone would organize some sort of reunion. I live to far away to do that myself.

32. I have reached the point in this pregnancy where I get hungry all the time, but when I eat, I get full very quickly. This makes it seem like I'm eating 24/7, and it's getting old.

33. I completely fail to see the point in TV shows like South Park and Trippin' the Rift. It takes very little talent to do sick humor, in my opinion.

34. My 21st birthday was celebrated in the middle of a farmer's field in Germany. I was a missionary and was on a bicycle camping trip. The campers all circled my tent at the stroke of midnight and sang to me. I told them that since I was born in America, it really wasn't my birthday yet. They didn't care.

35. My husband and I tried to conceive for 4 1/2 years, and after the first year we conceived but suffered a miscarriage. It was awful.

36. The first secular rock concert I ever attended was Nelson, Lynch Mob and Cinderella. My taste in music got better, I promise.

37. Speaking of music, my husband has hooked me on the band Rush. I've been to two of their concerts and thoroughly enjoyed them both.

38. As a kid, I hated having an August birthday because we could never celebrate it in my school classroom with a party.

39. I accepted Jesus as my Savior when I was about 7 yrs old. I really started to grow as a Christian in my teen years.

40. When I was a very young kid, my parents had a vacation trailer in Delaware. One day at the beach I swam into a huge swarm of jellyfish and was stung so badly that my mom rolled me in sand to pull out the poison. I'm still petrified of jellyfish.

41. I have 4 weeks till my due date and I still haven't packed my bag for the hospital OR bought a carseat. I'm beginning to panic.

42. I don't have any in-laws. Both Paul's folks passed away, and he's an only child. There are times this makes me sad, and other times, I am relieved.

43. I have no tattoos, but I know exactly what I'd get and where I'd put it if I ever got drunk or brave enough. :) But I'm not telling.

44. I stopped dying my hair when I got pregnant. My hair was long at the time, so I got it cut, and now I remember what my real hair color is. Boring.

45. I miss my grandmother (on my mom's side). I never had to question how much she loved me, and I know if she were still alive (and in good mental health) she'd be thrilled about me having a baby.

46. Now that I'm an adult, I revel in the fact that no one can force me to eat things I don't like, such as liver with onions or stewed tomatoes.

47. I firmly believe that if gas prices get any higher, we're not going to be able to afford going anywhere but to work, church, the doctor and the grocery store. Today the lowest price per gallon is $2.53/gallon.

48. I don't think I have a singularly favorite movie. I have favorites among genres. I wonder if these means I watch too many movies.

49. I will miss the show "Six Feet Under" when it is finished - even though I probably shouldn't be watching it to begin with, because it's not exactly the purest show on TV.

50. I used to make cabinet doors for a living. I'd have never imagined me doing that kind of work, and I'm not sure I'd want to do it again.

51. At church, I participate in a group of people who help plan each church service. It's fun because we get to come up with creative ways to express the point each Sunday.

52. I cannot stand beauty pageants. I think they're ridiculous displays of boobs and legs, no matter how much the promoters try to convince us that they're scholarship programs. The degree to which I find them reprehensible is directly proportional to how young the contestants are.

53. I played field hockey when I was in 10th grade. I was the goalie, and it was by far my best year of high school. Apparently, sports can do that for a person.

54. I have developed an affinity for contemporary country music. I'm not much for the older stuff, but I like a lot of what is coming out now.

55. I love both episodes of the Blue Collar Comedy Tour. They are hilarious, especially if you have ever lived in the south.

56. My father was actually interested in my mom's sister first, but when she didn't show him any attention and my mom did, he switched gears and soon mom and dad were married.

57. Only once in my life have I been drunk enough to throw up. It was very unpleasant; hence, it happened only once.

58. When I was a kid, I lost control of my bike and fell at a high rate of speed while going down a hill. I had 7 stitches in my chin, and because I was wearing a halter top, I had to have gravel picked out of my tummy.

59. Some of my favorite memories from my teenage years involve my church youth group and especially my best friend Kristin.

60. My parents took me to the movies when I was about 4. The movie we saw? Jaws. I spent most of it with my head covered by my mom's sweater.

61. I have never seen so many pink clothes as I have at my 3 baby showers. I really REALLY hope the ultrasound techs were right.

62. We are not naming our baby girl until we see her. I'm too afraid of declaring her name now and then changing my mind after she's born, and I really didn't want any wrongly-embroidered baby items.

63. Only once has a flight I've taken been cancelled. I got stuck in Atlanta overnight with no luggage at 7 months pregnant. Definitely a low point of this pregnancy.

64. I am fairly sick of people thinking and acting like life is all about them. Haven't they seen all the other people walking around?

65. For the life of me, I cannot neatly fold a contour sheet of any size. My mom insists it's easy, but I am still having trouble.

66. On my last birthday, which just passed on Aug. 10, I turned 34. I feel a lot younger than that.

67. I do not like jazz, especially free-form or fusion. I just don't get it.

68. By marriage to Paul, I am related to the 2nd Vice President of the United States, William Rufus King. Apparently he was gay and was involved with James Buchanan. So I'm not sure I should be proud of this.

69. The first time I saw the movie "Sister Act", it was in Germany, and therefore dubbed in German. I still understood most of it.

70. It freaks me out a little to see shows I remember on prime time TV now being featured on the TV Land network. It makes me feel really old.

71. I am really scared of labor, but I think at this point I'm more scared of that giant needle they use to administer the epidural. I have no idea what I'm about to deal with.

72. I was a pretty good kid in school. Never got detention - never even got sent to the principal's office. Boring, huh?

73. While I found TV shows like "Friends" and "Seinfeld" funny, I never saw it as "appointment TV". I'm thankful for this, because now if I catch these shows in syndication, they're actually interesting.

74. The only thing I've ever won in a raffle was a Thanksgiving turkey. I was about 8 years old.

75. I refer to Christmas of 1993 as "The Christmas from Hell". We spent that Christmas in a hunting cabin in northern PA. It was freezing cold, we had at least 2 feet of snow, and the cabin has no running water. On top of that, my grandfather got sick and couldn't make it to the outhouse, so he'd just "whip it out" in front of anyone in the room.

76. It annoys me when people drive their shopping carts like they drive their cars - with no indication that they recognize they are sharing the aisle with others.

77. When I was a kid I saw the movie "The Shining". It scared me so badly that I truly thought I saw those two little girls at the end of the hallway in our house. I didn't sleep all night that night.

78. When I'm choosing paint colors for our house, I get really nervous about making the right decision. In some strange immature part of my subconscious, I'm worried that my mother will not approve of my choices. Crazy, huh?

79. I don't make casseroles, largely because I don't know how. I can follow a recipe for one if I have it, but I wouldn't even know where to start to make one on my own.

80. My eyes are blue, and I think they are my favorite thing about my appearance.

81. This pregnancy has been very easy - almost no morning sickness or strange cravings. No high blood pressure or gestational diabetes. Just some round ligament pain every now and then. I feel very blessed.

82. I play guitar and piano, but neither of them well. I like to sing, but I'm not sure how good I am at that, either.

83. My grandparents on my mother's side used to play music for square dances. They spent almost every Saturday night out playing when my mom was a kid.

84. We have a place on a lake in Alabama, and most times, I'd rather be there than wherever I currently am. It's beautiful and very relaxing.

85. I HATE those Enzyte "Smilin' Bob" commercials. They are hokey and in poor taste.

86. I am a fan of University of Alabama football, largely because my husband is a graduate of U of A, and once you cross the line into the state of Alabama, you have to declare allegiance to either U of A or AU (Auburn University).

87. I've never seen the Godfather movies. Never had an interest in them, honestly. Not my style.

88. I think Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan have great on-screen chemistry. Hollywood has yet to find a comparable couple from the next generation.

89. Fall is my favorite season. I love the smell of woodsmoke and the crispness in the air.

90. I love college towns. There's just an air of adventure, learning and fun. Maybe when I get older I won't like them so much, but for now I really prefer that environment.

91. I like chatting online, but I don't think people should be rude online just becaues they can hide behind a screen name. I act online the way I act in real life.

92. When people are ignorant enough to call me "fat" to my face, I want to say "Yeah, I may be fat, but I can lose weight. What are you gonna do about being ugly?"

93. In some ways I'm glad I'm having my first child at 34, because this has given me time to observe other parents and make decisions about what seems to work and what doesn't regarding parenting styles. I've learned a lot from watching my friends.

94. I really wish I were the type of person who always has a smile and a cheery comment, but I tend to express any emotion I'm having very obviously. This may be my downfall someday.

95. I really love my husband. He's my best friend, and anytime anything happens in my life, he's the one I want to talk to about it.

96. I'm really scared about raising a child in today's culture. When I see kids out there and what they're faced with, I see how much worse it is than it was for me, and I pray hard for wisdom and guidance to help my child navigate the confusing path to adulthood.

97. I get really nervous dealing with the elderly. I don't know how to talk to them. I think it may be because the elderly sometimes say whatever they are thinking, no matter how rude, because they figure they're old enough to not care, and I've had my feelings hurt by older folks.

98. Christmas is my favorite holiday. There's just something fun about the atmosphere. This doesn't mean, however, that I like it when the holiday decorations come out before Halloween. That's a little ridiculous.

99. As much as I like attention, when I'm the center of it, I never know how to act or what to say. I'm always afraid I'm making a fool of myself.

100. It took me about 5 hours, off and on, to complete this list.

Well, there ya go. If you read the whole thing, kudos to you!

So much stuff...

....for such a little person! This tiny little person I have yet to meet seems to require more gear than a professional mountain climber! How can this be? According to today's ultrasound, she weighs less than 6 pounds, and yet we still need to acquire about 600 pounds of stuff. I guess the more helpless a person is, the more equipment is needed to care for her. I don't even know what she looks like but I have to shop for her. Buying things for someone you don't know is always awkward. Buying HEAPS of stuff for someone who is simultaneously so close to you and so unknown is just bizarre. But to be honest, I'm loving every minute of it.

Oh, and a great big THANK YOU to everyone who were so generous at the baby shower held today at Paul's work.

Another year

I'm 34 today. Remember when this age seemed old? Thankfully when I tell people how old I am, they are usually surprised because they think I'm in my late 20s. And actually I don't feel this age. Though, what exactly is 34 supposed to feel like? I have no idea.

Maybe I don't feel my age because we don't have children (yet - one on the way). It always seems to me that folks with kids are so much older than me, even if they're 8 years younger. It must be something about where you are in life. Responsibility doesn't just bring privilege, as my mother used to tell me. It also brings grey hair, wrinkles, and an air of maturity. Now that we're about to have a new HUGE responsibility, I expect I'll feel and seem a lot older.

Ah well, good-bye youth, here comes motherhood.

Frustrating Furniture

The other day my husband and I were out shopping with a friend when we came upon a piece of furniture that seemed to solve a problem we'd been having. I've been wanting something to serve as a bookshelf for the baby's room, but something that was going to "grow" with her. We were in Kmart (of all places) and we came upon this great bench with an open front with the perfect place for books. It matched the furniture we already have in the room, and since it served as a bench WITH storage, it seemed ideal. So we go grab one (assembly required) and haul it home.

Last night we decided to tackle our assembly project. It actually seemed to tackle us. We had some serious trouble putting this thing together. The directions weren't so hard to follow, despite having been printed in China; the pieces just didn't seem to want to go together the way they were supposed to. After the first 4 hours, Paul said that he thought maybe the whole thing was in fact designed in China, and sent to America as a strategic preemptive strike against us, to confuse us and keep us distracted. :) He's so funny.

Eventually we got the silly thing together, after about 5 hours. It looks good now, and it really WILL be the ideal piece to serve it's purpose. But I won't EVER buy another piece of "assembly yourself" furniture from Kmart!!!

The Passing of a Pro

Like so many others, I was so saddened to hear of the passing of Peter Jennings of ABC World News Tonight. I grew up watching him, and I clearly remember when he became ABC's lead anchor after the death of Frank Reynolds. So many of my "news memories" center around his coverage of the events, most notably the year 2000 and 9/11. I often felt that he was a good bit more balanced than some other anchors. Perhaps the thing I will miss most is how sincere he seemed when he was relaying more difficult stories, like the Challenger explosion. It always felt like he was still human, no matter how professional he was.

We'll miss you, Peter. I hope you're finally resting.

5 weeks to go!!!

Wow, this pregnancy has FLOWN! It's hard to believe I have 5 weeks to go. Folks at church were asking "So when are we having this baby?" Wouldn't it be nice if we could really SHARE this experience, including the pain? Ah well. My ideal experience would be to go into labor the day after I accomplish everything on my to-do list.

These past few days I've had a lot of pain in my hips, but from what I've read, that's normal for this stage. Something about "relaxin" making my hip joints loosen up. And today I was very active so that probably added to it. It hurts just to stand sometimes. I'm looking forward to that part being over.

But this really is the easiest parenthood will ever be. I mean, she's with me all the time and I don't have to check if she's eating or sleeping properly. I just carry her around and the rest takes care of itself. From here on out it's gonna get harder!

Photos of Our Nursery

I decided to do some original art for the baby's room. I think it's always nice to add a personal touch like this. Here you see the changing table, flanked on either side by a flower and butterfly series. I also painted the hooks on either side. Note the "thing" flying from the ceiling - it's a butterfly made of wire and painted nylon, hanging with some fishing wire.






Here's the crib bedding we chose. The room was already lavendar when we discovered we were pregnant, but after choosing this bedding, we realized the lavendar on the walls did NOT match the bedding in any way. So we had the room repainted. Isn't this bedding adorable? I really would like to hang the quilt on the wall, but I haven't figured out how to do it yet.





Here's the crib we chose. Our furniture is from Baby's Dream - it's the Generation Next line. This bed will convert to a toddler bed and eventually to a full sized adult double bed. We figure this was a very practical decision - we'll just have to buy different bedding, but her bed will always be the same, barring any unforseen happenings.






That's another butterfly hanging from the ceiling. And yes, that's a butterfly net on the wall. Nice touch, huh? The Amish doll on the chest is a token of my home state - I grew up in Pennsylvania, very near Amish country. I just thought it would be nice to have a momento from my hometown.







Yep, another butterfly hanging from the ceiling. And I did that painting, too. I got the window valance from Lowe's, of all places. It's just flowers, but it really goes well with the bedding and other items in the room.

Getting started

Finally I've crossed something off my "baby preparation to-do" list. Some items I can't do without Paul's help, so those will need to be saved for evenings and weekends. But there are lots of things on this list I can do by myself - I just need to get motivated. It's hard because I'm pretty tired and that whole "nesting" instinct hasn't completely kicked in yet. It's much easier to rest on the couch and watch tv than to get up and scrub the kitchen or organize the bathroom. And there are a few things I won't really be able to do until after I've had all my baby showers (I'm having 3 in all - aren't I so loved?). That way I'll be able to get the nursery truly organized and go purchase all the things I didn't recieve.

Speaking of this, I'm a little nervous about how we're gonna get the big items like the travel system and the pack 'n play. There are things like the high chair that we can wait on, but I can't leave the hospital with the baby if we have no car seat. I guess as a last resort Paul could go get one while I'm in the hospital, but I'd rather have it all set up ahead of time to make sure it's installed properly.

I guess money worries are common for us grown-ups, especially when about to become parents. I'll have a little time off from work, which means a break in the income. And there will be a jump in the expenses with our baby's arrival. I have tried to reason it out that because we won't be going out to movies or restaurants for a while, it may balance out.

All the time in the world....

You know, I have less than 6 weeks till my due date, and this week I realized that I've been acting like I have all the time in the world to finish my to-do list to prepare for this baby. There's a lot I want to get done before she is born, and I really would like to be done by the time I hit 38 weeks. I'd better get cracking. If I handle one task every other day, I'm sure I can get it all done way before then. I just can't keep acting like I don't have a deadline!

It's me, for real.

Yep, this is me. It's a few years old (just one or two) but is still pretty much what I look like. I don't LOOK crazy, do I?

Southern Summer Pregnancy

You know, back when I used to think that I'd be able to actually PLAN when I got pregnant, I thought I'd get pregnant around September or October, deliver in May or June, and effectively SKIP all the hot months. Yeah, that was BEFORE I knew I'd have to take it whenever it came. So here I am, 8 1/2 months pregnant in July in Mississippi. Nothing could be further from the plan I had. But I've learned how to manage. If I have to go out, whenever possible, I ask my husband to go out and start the car and let it cool off first. Mostly, I don't go outside. Between the heat and humidity, I can't handle more than a few minutes at a time out there. All I can say is thank the good Lord for air conditioning and lemonade!!!

We made it!

Well, Dennis was not nearly as damaging as he could have been. We slept in our living room because the bedroom is closer to trees in the neighbor's yard, and if they hit the house while we were in bed, we'd be goners. So we bunked on our couches, which wasn't nearly as comfy for me as it was for my hubby. The power went off and on several times, and I think I woke up for every switch. So I didn't sleep much. Once hubby went off to work, I went to bed (the REAL bed) and slept for another 3 hours. I felt a lot better after that.

We didn't have any damage, and as far as I know, no one we know had any problems either. Someone Paul (the hubby) works with has a wife who JUST had a baby - like Friday - and they got home just as Dennis was blowing into town. I felt SO sorry for them, and at the same time I was SO glad it wasn't me. That would not be the way I'd like to start family life!

Menacing Dennis

Hurricane Dennis made landfall about an hour ago. At this moment, the Mississippi governor is on Fox News saying that most of the damage are areas Meridian and NORTH, not around the coast. That's scary, since WE are north of Meridian. We've done some prep for the storm - extra water and food, flashlights, batteries, a battery radio, etc. We also have a place on a lake in Alabama, and truthfully I'm more concerned about THAT than I am about this house. It is surrounded by trees, and because it is on the eastern side of the storm, there is a higher likelihood of tornados in that area. All we can do is wait and pray, and have friends there check on our place. We'll be watching the weather channel almost round the clock to see what's going on. It was said earlier this year that this would be a very bad hurricane season, and we may have to go through this several more times before the end of October.

I'm really glad that I'm still pregnant at this point. I can't imagine having to worry about taking care of a newborn during this kind of emergency, and I hope it doesn't come up after the baby is born. That would create a whole new level of worry for me.

The Power of Choice

It is remarkably easy to blame negative aspects of my life on a variety of factors outside myself. Genetics, finances, family, friends, even pets make perfect excuses for the lack of modification of my behavior. The truth, however, is that while many things still lie outside my control, there are in fact MORE things I can choose to change.

For instance, there may be multiple issues that could create a difficult labor and delivery for me. But one thing I can do to try to tilt the scale in my favor is to stick to an exercise schedule. It was easy for me to think, "Oh, I'm pregnant, and I'm tired, and it's just too hard to get up and get to the pool for aquaerobics." Yet regardless of my tiredness, working out is good for me, good for the baby, and a great way to get in better shape so I can endure the upcoming labor with more stamina.

Why is it so easy to ignore the power of a choice? Is it because I don't truly believe my choices will have consequences? Could it be that I think I can escape any negative consequences, and still reap rewards even if I choose badly? No matter what the reason, the power of choice is mine, and I choose to grasp it firmly with both hands and use it for my best interest.

Parental Visit

It's always interesting when my parents come to visit. They arrived Thursday and left at 5:30 this morning. (Classic move for my folks.) They've never truly gotten along like the parents in American sit-coms, and to be honest I'm surprised they are still married after almost 38 years. At this point they basically just tolerate one another. But now that they have a grandchild (their first) on the way, I can see that they've mellowed a bit. It lets them both be excited about the same thing, which frankly is quite a miracle. It was a pleasant visit. We talked, shopped, went out to dinner, went to church together, and didn't have any real fights or even tense moments. Hopefully this is a sign of things to come.

Coming up...

My parents are coming for a visit this weekend. Mom said she couldn't let me go through the entire pregnancy without seeing me in maternity clothes. Cute, huh? So I'm busy cleaning the house and getting things ready. You know how it is when a mom comes to visit. Everything needs to be just so. I'm looking forward to this visit. I haven't seen them since Christmas. It turns out I actually WAS pregnant then, but didn't know it yet.

My parents tend to check in with me more often now - I guess because they're concerned for my health and the baby. I probably get a call from them 3 or 4 times a week. I never get to call them because by the time I think of it, they're calling me. I hope they don't think I don't want to talk to them. It's just that I almost never have anything new to report.

By the way....

I didn't mention in my first post, but I'm 16 weeks pregnant with our first child. The other half of "our" is Paul, my husband, whom I met online back in the days of IRC. Anyway, today I had a test for gestational diabetes. It's a little earlier than most women get tested, but I'm already insulin resistant so it's probably a good thing that they tested me earlier. This was a one-hour test and the result came back at 140, which according to some websites I've seen is on the high side. I have a feeling the doctor will make me come back and do the 3-hour test. Hurrah. I just keep praying I don't have gestational diabetes, because that would just be one more thing to obsess about!

Well, why the heck not?

So blogging is the "next big thing" and apparently EVERYONE is doing it. So who am I to fight the rolling tides of progress? Here I am, blogging along with the rest of these internet-savvy citizens. I've noticed that blogging is a lot like ranting, and while it can be healthy, it may not always have a real point. So beware. I promise nothing except being genuine. There may be times you will cheer for me, or nod in approval or agreement. Then again, there may be times (albeit hopefully not frequent) when you will want to quickly click the exit X in disgust, anger or frustration. But isn't that the beauty of the freedoms of speech and choice? Till next time, when I'm very likely to be less philosophical and more down-to-earth, thanks for reading!