Saturday, November 01, 2008

Longing...still...

It's not that I would wish for one moment that someone else really had to go through my experience with infertility. And it's not as though I would choose to disregard the joy of someone experiencing pregnancy. Having been through it once myself, I wish them all the best.

That being said, it is sometimes very painful to read blogs of women enjoying their second or even third healthy pregnancy. I'm 37 with one child, and with every passing month I'm even more aware that the clock is ticking way too fast. I feel like I'm almost out of time. I'm scared. I want to be content, to say (and mean) that I really am perfectly fine with being a one-child family.

But I'm not.

This is no fun.

1 comment:

ashiacole said...

amanda... my heart is hurting for you right now, even though i don't really understand the pain that you feel since i have no experince in that area!

just wondering, though, if you and paul have thought about adoption? international adoptions usually only take around 2 years. just a thought...

hope you guys have a great weekend. love the photos of jayden dressed up!